She asks me why
I'm just a hairy guy
I'm hairy noon and night
Hair that's a fright
I'm hairy high and low
Don't ask me why
Don't know
It's not for lack of break
Like the Grateful Dead
Darling

Gimme head with hair
Long beautiful hair
Shining, gleaming,
Streaming, flaxen, waxen

Give me down to there hair
Shoulder length or longer
Here baby, there mama
Everywhere daddy daddy

Hair, hair, hair, hair, hair, hair, hair
Flow it, show it
Long as God can grow it
My hair

Let it fly in the breeze
And get caught in the trees
Give a home to the fleas in my hair
A home for fleas
A hive for bees
A nest for birds
There ain't no words
For the beauty, the splendor, the wonder
Of my...

Hair, hair, hair, hair, hair, hair, hair
Flow it, show it
Long as God can grow it
My hair

I want it long, straight, curly, fuzzy
Snaggy, shaggy, ratty, matty
Oily, greasy, fleecy
Shining, gleaming, streaming
Flaxen, waxen
Knotted, polka-dotted
Twisted, beaded, braided
Powdered, flowered, and confettied
Bangled, tangled, spangled, and spaghettied!

Oh say can you see
My eyes if you can
Then my hair's too short

Down to here
Down to there
Down to where
It stops by itself

They'll be ga ga at the go go
When they see me in my toga
My toga made of blond
Brilliantined
Biblical hair

My hair like Jesus wore it
Hallelujah I adore it
Hallelujah Mary loved her son
Why don't my mother love me?

Hair, hair, hair, hair, hair, hair, hair
Flow it, show it
Long as God can grow it
My hair, hair, hair, hair, hair, hair, hair
Flow it, show it
Long as God can grow it
My hair.

Blood was shed at [ 8:41 PM ]

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“I'm fortunate to know a lot of incredibly talented people. Ironically, they all want to be penguins.”

Comedian Bob Saget was taking in a showing of "March of the Penguins" when his buddy, producer David Permut, came up with the idea of doing a send-up of the hit documentary.

"The idea for this came organically," Saget says. "I was watching the 'March' movie at a screening at my friend's house, and I couldn't stop doing the voice-overs of the penguins, reminiscent of when I did the voices of the animals on the video show. My friend David Permut said, there's a great comedy movie in this!!"

THINKFilm got involved in what is now titled, "Farce of the Penguins," a comedic send-up of "March of the Penguins." Production is now underway on the film with a release planned for the spring of 2006.

According to a statement issued by THINKFilm, Bob Saget will write, direct, produce, and will perform several of the voices in "Farce of the Penguins." The film will feature "spectacular and heartwarming wildlife photography" however the narrative and soundtrack will be R-rated.

THINKFilm President and CEO Jeff Sackman said, "The Penguin film, and wildlife films in general, have been so hugely popular lately, that they can certainly use some serious spoofing.
Bob's unique ability to take sweet, clean-cut material and turn it upside down and inside out is second to none, and I can't wait to see him 'flip the bird' to the entire genre."



Bob Saget is one sick little man. But oddly enough, his perverse mind and vulgar ways (see his "Conan O'Brien appearance") somehow make him that much more loveable. Just how does he do it? Is the Saget using his mind-tricks to toy with an entire nation. And the answer is...Yes! Bob Saget Is God.com

Blood was shed at [ 8:10 PM ]

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Friday, July 14, 2006

The human body is the best picture of the human soul.

Charo, and her world famous "Chuchi Chuci" *insert head scratchings here*

Bob Saget, giving himself the Heimlich maneuver. Oh, sweet joy.

Vince, the cutie from Entourage.

The Sagetizer once again, busting a move.

And my personal favorite, the "Lighten Up It's Just Fashion" Number a la Project Runway.

Hehe. My own, homemade Gifs. God I need a social life.

Blood was shed at [ 9:48 AM ]

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You're such a loser!

By  Victorai, at 8:01 PM  

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Monday, July 10, 2006

May the man be dammed and never grow fat, who wears two faces under one hat.

Recent reports suggest that Kristie Alley, star of the now-deceased show Cheers and the should-be-deceased Fat Actress, has gone on a murderous killing spree outside of a Hollywood resturant. After failing to prepare the actress her requested meal (reportedly, they didn't have 50 lbs of fried filet mignon in stock), the cook was drenched with a supersoaker containing Alley's stomach acid. Following his death, the hostess, waiter, and random thin customers were taken hostage for a short while...until Kristie got hungry and devoured them. As the out-of-control star continues to plague the city, squirting and killing some with her gun, consuming others, the death toll continues to climb to staggering amounts.

Blood was shed at [ 1:33 PM ]

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Wednesday, July 05, 2006

"What does it take for a girl to impress you?"
"Well, it usually involves a feather boa and the theme to A Summer Place."

Since I just spent a good amount of my time in the wonderful state of Florida (which is actually my birthplace- Bethesda Memorial in Boynton Beach), I should probably tell of my many misadventures there, considering this could be considered a journal and I could be considered the journal-author. So, what exactly happened? Besides learning of the wonders of Shoneys,



Publix,




And the pure splendor that is Mr. Pibb,


Not much really went on. No, there was no romping in Disney World or Sea World or Islands of Adventure or Space Camp or any other major amusement park that we were a mere couple hours away from. Most of the time was spent with family (enter warm, fuzzy "aww" here). Which was okay, I guess, but we were in FREAKIN FLORIDA!! And we didn't even go to Disneyworld! Is that even morally right? Did we break some kind of unspoken law? Well, if our town is suddenly afflicted with a plague of locusts, I will know why...and that Moses apparently loves Magic Kingdom.




Space mountain, to be exact. (Aren't my image editing skills just superb? :P)

Blood was shed at [ 9:29 AM ]

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Sunday, July 02, 2006

It's true that every time you hear a bell, an angel gets its wings. But what they don't tell you is that every time you hear a mouse trap snap, an angel gets set on fire.

My favorite commercials on television now:



It's the random Asian guy at the end...he always gets me.



And, although it's not recent, pretty much my favorite commercial EVER:

Blood was shed at [ 4:54 PM ]

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